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As far as what’s on this weekend, get real.  It’s Super Bowl Sunday and you know it’s pointless to talk about anything else.  I get that some parents have issues with the violence of football, and I respect that.  So go read that evening/afternoon.

Otherwise, enjoy the game as a family, using it as a chance to expand the father-son bonding thing to moms and daughters, too.  It’s on NBC this year, with kick off around 6 p.m., ET, 3 p.m. PT, cuz it’s actually live.

Also, I wanted to touch on something that I didn’t comment on when I read Lisa Belkin’s excellent New York Times parenting blog, Motherlode.  Yesterday’s post was a little scary, about a study that claims mothers are extremely angry at their partners for a lot of reasons, but mostly because the guys still aren’t helping out as much and are still pretty clueless.

Now, if you scroll down, you’ll see that I pointed out the huge tradition of clueless dads on TV (which my husband just now pointed out probably began with Homer Simpson in the mid 1980s – and I mean the egregiously stupid ones that certainly have dominated sitcoms in the past few years).  How much of that is the guys who write sitcoms reflecting their own sense of cluelessness, I don’t know.  After all, the role of Dad has changed dramatically in less than two generations, and given how out of touch our fathers were, I can understand why guys don’t want to emulate that role.  But that does give these new dads precious little to build on.

However, I’d also like to add onto that thought another based on one of the other comments the post received – that maybe it’s not the dads that the moms are all angry at, but the moms’ situation.  Maybe, indeed.  Because while I was tooling around on that site and some other mommy blogs, one thing came across again and again – this intense need to do everything right, to be perfect.  To make sure our kids get exactly the right nutrition.  To make sure they get the right amount of sleep.  To make sure they get into the top kindergartens.  To make sure they’re protected at all times from things like salmonella, which can be deadly, but far, far more often is just a miserable night hugging the toilet.

Is it possible that what’s got all of us with our respective knickers in a twist is this desperate need to be perfect?  Could it be we’re actually depriving our kids of the chance to make mistakes and learn from them?  Of allowing them the odd illicit pleasure of bending the rules?

I couldn’t help laughing at an earlier post on Motherlode, in which a parent asked about adjusting her infant’s sleep schedule so that her husband could have time with his daughter and the three of them could go out to dinner with friends a couple nights a week.

There were plenty of parents who agreed that it doesn’t really matter when a kid goes to bed, just that the infant get at least 10 hours a night and that bedtime is consistent.  I not only concur, but from my own experience can tell you that I was anything but consistent and my daughter has always been a perfectly good sleeper – except when she got a hold of a book she couldn’t put down and turned the light on after we went to bed.

But at least as many parents insisted that babies not only had to go to bed at the same time every night, but that it had to be early, like 7:30 p.m. early.  If Dad wanted to connect with his daughter, he needed to get up early.  If they wanted to connect with friends, it had to be on the baby’s schedule or they had to sacrifice.

Oh, for crying out loud.  I agree that being a parent does mean a certain amount of sacrifice, but giving up connecting with friends – especially ones with kids of a similar age – just so the baby can go to bed at a specific time that someone else found useful?  What about the parents’ well-being?  Isn’t that important, too?  We all need connection with others.  Community is critical to raising healthy children.  More critical than babies going to bed at a specific time.

And one of the biggest complaints of the angry moms was not enough time for themselves.  Could it be that they’re stuck in “being perfect,” with little time for anything else?  Is it possible that perfectionism, this idea that there’s only one “right” way to raise children, is behind all this anger?  Is it possible the idea that our kids come first to the point of hurting ourselves breeds nothing but resentment and spoiled kids?

I’m not saying parents don’t have to sacrifice at times.  But so do kids.  In a family, everyone must learn to work together and learn how to negotiate and compromise – fine skills for the business world, I assure you.  I would even argue that the lack of those skills has been a major problem in our government since the Clinton administration.  And to bring this back to television, which is, after all, the point of this blog, one way to build those skills is to have a single television in the house, which everyone shares.

So, okay, not everyone is a football fan in your household.  Find a way to work it out so that everyone has something to enjoy this Sunday.  Maybe even agree to flip over to Animal Planet for the Puppy Bowl during the half-time show.  Or the non-football fans can disect the commercials, although those aren’t always that family-safe.  Whatever.

The idea is that everyone gains when we all work together and forget about what is politically correct or perfect.  Maybe muddling through as our best imperfect, clueless selves – moms or dads – is the best way to be present and loving and right for our kids.  And if the family down the street does it another way, well, that’s right for them.  So there.

Anne Louise Bannon

Your Family Viewer

Point one – I know this blog is mostly about television programming, but occasionally, I get the odd DVD release thrown at me and if it’s worthwhile, I see no reason not to feature it here.

Point two – ain’t that much happening tonight.

The problem is I have a lot of mixed feelings about Disney’s Mary Poppins, which was released in a new two-disc set on DVD on Tuesday.  After all, it was the very first movie I remember seeing in a real-live movie theater (as opposed to the back seat of my parents’ station wagon at a drive-in).  We went for my younger sister’s birthday, as I recall, and way back in the Pleistocene era, when I grew up, that was a pretty big deal.

Then, of course, some years later, I got hit with the usual rude awakening when I read the books by P. L. Travers and realized they were completely different from the movie!  The horror!  The angst!  What were they thinking?  The books are wa-a-a-a-ay better than the movie.

It’s amazing what a few years of perspective will do for you.  I was supposed to look at the peripherals on the DVD, but my husband talked me into looking at the movie, instead.  And you know what?  It’s a pretty good little movie.  Yes, Uncle Walt and crew spliced together several of the books into one film – which is seldom a good idea.  But I’d forgotten all the wit and intelligence that was still there.  Not to mention the delightful performances of David Tomlinson as the put-upon father George Banks.  Or Dick Van Dyke, with his barely passable cockney accent as Bert.  I actually saw him almost 15 years later on stage still keeping up with the chorus dancers as Professor Harold Hill in a production of The Music Man.  Not a trained dancer, by any stretch, but the guy could move, and he does in Mary Poppins, too.

And nobody, but nobody sings with such zest as Julie Andrews.  Alas, not even Julie Andrews anymore.  It says a lot about Andrews’ ability as an actress that everyone saw her as sweet and innocent when you realize that Poppins was, in fact, totally vain and a bit of a witch, personality-wise.  And Andrews pulled it off, seeming not to care, when in fact, the character obviously did – she returned multiple times to the Banks’ nursery.

I recommend watching the DVD with your spouse or someone else of your generation before watching it with your kids – and I highly recommend watching it with your kids.  But with the other adult, you’ll be able to stop and start and talk over all your respective memories of the film (assuming you got to see it when you were still young), gripe about how it’s different from the book, gleefully sing along nonetheless (my husband and I were both appalled at how many of the lyrics we still recalled).  Then, with all of that out of your system, you can watch it straight through with your kids and enjoy it all over again through their eyes.

And then deal with the angst when they discover that the books are still wa-a-a-a-ay better than the movie.

Anne Louise Bannon

Your Family Viewer

The drama with the office Internet connection continues apace, while my ongoing disdain for tech non-support only grows (30 minutes on a chat, asking the same question five different times just to find out the difference between two similar cables).

The good news – not much on for the next couple nights.

If you’re not already following me on Twitter, then check back over the next couple days. In the meantime, kindly pray, cross fingers, think good thoughts or whatever your preferred invocation to the Powers That Be, on my behalf. Thanks.

Anne Louise Bannon

Your Family Viewer

Wow.  Got a surprise today – of the pleasant kind.  Okay, I figured TNT’s new show, Trust Me, would be at least watchable.  However, I did not expect it to be un-raunchy as it was.  And Nickelodeon’s new series for pre-schoolers, Olivia, was absolutely delightful.

There’s a reason you don’t see a lot of kid shows reviewed here.  That’s because most of them are…  Well, this being a family-oriented blog, let’s just say they defy the use of polite language.  My beloved husband, The Grinch, would argue that most television falls into the same category – and he does have a point.  But even he was charmed by Olivia, premiering today at 11:00 a.m., and running on weekdays.

Olivia, based on the books by Ian Falconer, is about a pig and her family.  Very humanoid pigs.  They walk around on two legs and talk and basically do all the sorts of things that we do.  Which is why I think this show works.  Olivia is not only your average 6 and 3/4 year old kid, she acts like it.  She’s sweet and curious and sometimes acts like a brat.  She’s not so bratty you can’t stand her, but thank heavens, she’s not so perfect you want to barf, either.  And they do some really fun visual gags at the beginning and end of the episodes.  We also really liked the early jazz-style soundtrack.  It’s one of the very few shows that you can watch with your pre-schooler and enjoy yourself.

Trust Me, airing tonight at 10 p.m., stars Eric McCormack and Tom Cavanagh as two advertising executives and friends who find their relationship challenged when one of them gets promoted over the other.  It’s not the most family-friendly show in terms of the story.  But, aside from a few language issues, it is relatively family-safe.  I suspect sex will rear its head from time to time, but given the pilot, it was remarkably restrained in that department.  It’s also nicely written with some genuine wit, not to mention excellent performances across the board. 

Because it’s about the world of advertising, it might be tempting to compare it to AMC’s uber-hot Mad Men, about advertising executives in the early 1960s.  Besides being set in the modern world, Trust Me is also a lot lighter than the dark, brooding Mad Men.  And, frankly, Mad Men is uncomfortable for me to watch.  Yes, I know that sexism and racism were all but considered normal in the 1960s, but sometimes I get the feeling that the show plays into it, getting away with it because that’s true to the time.  Trust Me has no such issues – at least not yet.  With Monica Potter as the hot shot copywriter Sarah, those issues might arise.  Then again, they might not.

Anne Louise Bannon

Your Family Viewer

It’s not so much that Nature’s latest doc stinks, but its subject sure does.  And on the opposite end of the spectrum is a chick flick that’s utterly sweet and genuine.  Depending on what your local PBS station is doing, they air one right after another.

First up, Is That Skunk?, the Nature doc supposedly airing at 8 p.m., but check your local listings for when your PBS station is airing it. We all know the not so delightful aroma of skunks in bloom, but the critters, themselves are pretty interesting.  More to the point, the doc, itself, is freaking hysterical, with a host of stinky puns (fully intended).  There aren’t that many, but there are more shots of a skunk’s backside than I really wanted to see.  Your average 11-year-old will love it.

My one quibble is the doc seems to skip over the issue of over-population and whether skunks are over-whelming other native species.  I’m not sure if it’s just not that big a problem or what.  Usually Nature docs are pretty good on things like that, even when you’re talking about killing cute animals – and skunks are pretty darned cute.  But otherwise, there’s some great footage here, including a skunk facing off with a mountain lion.

The other issue for parents is that we should encourage our kids to check out the wildlife in our own backyards.  Seriously, there are some cool critters worth observing.  For example, we have possum, raccoons, squirrels and rats in our yard, not to mention snakes, lizards, a host of different birds and insects.  Dr. Neil deGrasse Tyson talked a couple weeks ago about encouraging our kids to develop a scientific curiosity.  Yeah, it’s a mess at times (fortunately the Nature doc gives a good recipe for de-stinking skunk spray).  But this is how we learn and how we develop a passion for learning in our kids.  Our kids need that.

We also need a little romance in our lives and the Hallmark Hall of Fame movie,Loving Leah, airing on CBS at 9 p.m., gives us just that.  Unfortunately, the Hallmark Hall of Fame pressroom is down, or I’d have all the cast names and the author of the play the movie is based on for you.

In any case, the story is based on an ancient Jewish law from the book of Leviticus.  When a man dies without children, his brother is expected to marry his wife to raise up children for him.  It’s not practiced anymore, but in Orthodox circles, as presented in the movie, there is a little ceremony to release the wife.  The catch is that it involves the man denying the existence of his brother.  Which is exactly the catch that gets Jake, a non-observant Jew whose adored older brother, Ben, became an Orthodox rabbi.  Ben has died, leaving his young wife, Leah.  It was an arranged marriage that Leah accepted, but found somewhat passion-less.

Leah, for herself, is perfectly happy to be released from the Levirate marriage because she wants to go to college and find her own life.  However, Jake, who had been estranged from his brother and is feeling guilty about it, can’t just let go.  So he proposes a marriage in name only to Leah.  She’ll live in his house as a room-mate and the two will happily go on with their lives.

You know where this is going and it goes there rather delightfully with a minimum of contrivances to make the path difficult for True Love.  It is also completely family safe.  There is some implied sexual activity, but at this point Jake and Leah are technically married and the fade out happens long before anything else does.  Nor do they wake up in bed together.  In fact, the two times they are shown in bed together, they’re fully clothed.  As for how well it depicts Orthodox Jewish life, I can’t say.  But they seem to get a lot of it right.  For example, Leah doesn’t use the phone on Shabbas and wears a wig to hide her hair.

And that’s it.  Back again for two new premieres on Monday.

Anne Louise Bannon

Your Family Viewer