I’ve got a problem. I’ve got an HBO movie, Temple Grandin, about an unconquerable spirit and the real need to do some spirit-squashing.
You see, several months ago, I wrote about Nickelodeon’s new game show Brain Surge, which is getting very popular. How do I know? I’m getting multiple comments on that post from kids dying to get on this show. I got six just yesterday from one kid alone. I’m trying to discourage this because there isn’t squat I can do to get them on. So I’m not posting the comments.
But sheez, the last thing I want to do is discourage kids from trying, both in terms of making the effort and in terms of thinking outside the box. So how do you balance realistic expectations (as in there are millions of kids trying out for this show – what are the odds you are going to stand out enough to get on?) with encouraging kids to try to overcome those very same odds because that’s how great things happen.
Take the HBO movie.
Temple Grandin
Safety Rating: Very safe, the worst is some bloody bull testicles.
Friendly Rating: Middle school and older, younger children familiar with autism might also enjoy it.
Quality Rating: Excellent.
Premieres on HBO on Saturday at 8 p.m.
Dr. Temple Grandin was born autistic. She didn’t learn to speak until she was four. She suffered greatly in school and later, but eventually used her autism to help her understand how best to handle cattle humanely in feed lots and slaughter houses. The movie, starring Claire Danes as Grandin, looks at Grandin’s life through her college years and early career – and the obstacles she faced not only as a person with autism, but as a woman in a man’s world in the 1970s.
The execution is mostly flawless. Okay, the first part dragged a little, but I eventually found myself sucked in. Danes’ performance is dead-on. We got to meet Dr. Grandin, herself, at the press conference for the movie last January, Danes obviously nailed it.
But beyond Danes, the story, itself, is compelling. Here’s a woman whose mother was told to give up and put her in an institution. Nonetheless, thanks to her mother, Grandin not only went to college, she graduated and got her Masters degree and eventually her PhD (although we don’t see that last part).
The interesting thing about the script is that Grandin says repeatedly that she knows how to treat the cattle humanely because of her autism. And at the press conference, the real Grandin pointed out that many of our greatest thinkers probably dealt with the lesser forms of the condition. As she put it, “You would have no hotel here if you didn’t have people that were interested in things, because after all, who do you think made the first stone spear? It wasn’t the yackity yacks around the campfire. That’s for sure.”
The story is a clear lesson in the magic of thinking beyond one’s expectations and in turning your supposed disabilities in to assets. Which brings me back to these kids trying to get on this stupid game show.
I think the key is not to be afraid of failure. Too often, we get the idea that failure is going to kills us. Or that if we fail, there’s something terribly wrong with us. But if you try out for a game show and don’t get on because there are, like, umpteen kajillion other folks trying to do the same thing – how much failure is there in that? Not much, I’d say.
We, as parents, need to model the willingness to try and fail. I’d rather try and not get somewhere than be safe and not try. So I fall on my face. So I’m not going to be the famous actor I wanted to be as a kid. At least I tried and found I liked writing better. Failure is always an option, and not as bad as all that. It’s certainly better than not trying.
Just be warned, there’s nothing I can do to get you on Brain Surge. Try something else, please.